meh and IFmeme MEH MEH!!! memememe!!!

 so lets see...this weekend was very low-key...very...too low key, in fact. sigh. its not that i hate mike. i don't. i mean, i've been with him for 3 years you know? when you are with someone that long, than yeah, you love em. yeah...i mean..you still care about them. so friday, we didn't really do anything. i think i made...uh...i dont remember what i ate friday?? oh yeah sausage peppers and onions. it was good! and some sauce. mike wanted to see 42 so we went to go see it (the jackie robinson film), well...it was a good movie! i'm glad we watched it. in fact, it was a nice night for mike and i. the thing is...ok.....yeah...so after that it was late we went to sleep..although i could hardly sleep because mikes snoring is so loud, it wakes me up. so i didnt get a good night sleep. he woke up around 8am next morning, and went downstairs, so i sort of was able to sleep for a bit. well, i went into the living room to try to sleep on the couch to try and get some rest, but like i said he woke up soon after so i went back in the other room and around 10 he came in and woke me up...so soon after i took a shower because i thought we were going to do something fun. well i was invited to a pig roast but i didnt go because i was with mike, so i said lets go walk around bethlehem. oh friday night stephanie wanted me to watch her kids so she could go to the casino, and she wanted me to drive to her house..where she lives super far. shes never did any favors for me either so wth? why do i want to watch her kids for free so she can go and gamble? anyways mike wanted to go to the casino and he wanted me to take out 20 which i didnt want too, he guilt tripped me because he pays for food oh yeah we had lunch at mollys. so i took out 20 and i was going to play slots but he wanted me to play craps which i was not feeling..and we played a 15.00 and i lost it. he gave me 5.00 so i lost 10.00. i was mad! and it seems i am constantly trying to have conversation with him and trying to explain to him that he makes me feel blah...we do not conversate! and he checks out other girls and he teases me about it he thinks it is funny but i am really starting to get sick of it! its very annoying! anyways, so..he knows i wanted to go out. with him! i wanted to actually go out have a few drinks with him, something we just have not done since...we moved in together! wow! he used to want to take me out. he used to hang out with me. hes so lame now! so what did we do???? well i thought he wanted to go out, (he said he did), so we went to delahantys (my treat) more bar food...meh..and mike got 2 beers and i got one. so it was pretty pricey, (for me) but whatever!?! so then i was like, 'where do you want to go now?" and he said we can have a few drinks at...sigh..pickled egg. meh....the bar across the street from our place in....wilson...meh

everything is so...MEH LATELY and i am so MEH'ING SICK OF IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i really am! so we had a quesadilla leftover (and also got some mozz sticks) so we went to drop the quesadilla in the fridge and i was like, 'ok lets go' and mike lays on the couch...and i was like' lets go!?" he just layed there..like a boring sack of shit!

eventually he got up and we had A drink at the place, but i didnt even want to bother because its so hard to have fun with him. and he talks to me like he is belittling and demeaning, talking about having no emotional attachments and most ppl do not understand that. i understand peace of mind, he says he has buddhist beliefs yet is so full of negativity, buddhists are balanced. they have a balance. they eat clean food, not little ceasers. he acts like i dont understand anything. its very irritating. i am capable of having conversation you know? 

so after that drink it was like, meh once again. we went back and he just layed on the couch. i was going to get a glass of wine but mike was being a bitch baby plus i didnt want to drink and be online, (something that has happened too much since i never actually hang out with anyone) i just didnt want to do that. i didnt want to drunk post (im Baby Poison now)...im not going to drink unless i have someone cool and fun to hang out with. i wouldnt of minded not drinking tho if i had healthy food to eat and i worked out. i need to join gym. my mom got me food but she got me perogies and pork rolls. (UNHEALTHY! but good)

so last night was just..well, yeah i dont know? so today we went to walmart and i bought a fishing pole, a cheap one. we were gonna go fishing...tomorrow too cuz mike took off tomorrow.  so he changed my oil. i wanted to get beer and chill out here, but mike brought his truck, which showed me he was planning on leaving. i have NEVER dated a guy who was as lame as him! nowadays i feel...well...everything is so stupid and boring! usually i would date someone who would want to hang out, drink some, chill...spend time with me...especially during the summers! i would start a new fun relationship during the SUMMERS! i have been with mike for 3 years...3...very....strained years! he just wants me to get a job get a job! why so i can help him out with rent, somewhere i feel miserable!?? why would i want to live there anymore if i cant even enjoy myself!? if i just get yelled at!?? you know? where i cant even have company without them feeling uncomfortable thanks to mike!?? its just not worth it anymore. im missing out on life! im 34 years old now! wth? when did that happen? and mike tells me he doesnt want kids. so wtf? i do! i want a family! yes i want to get married someday! the more im with him, the more that will never even come close to happening!

and him always getting turned on by kaley cuoco and actresses is just turning me off to the point where it is hilariously comical, because i just don't care! if mike doesn't like me, then fine! if he is not attracted to me, fine! FINE I DONT CARE ANYMORE!!! you know i dont care anymore! -phil collins

whatever!? mike knows this. oh moss mentioned something about the hangover 3 premiere...if we can get in...if...if..oh IF>!! -cinderella stepsisters

  

 i told mike i would go heck yeah who wouldnt if they had the chance he said fuck that garbage this n that...get a job! so....yeah of course i want a job! ok? but i also want to meet conan (hopefully fingers crossed) plus i have those tickets for that VIP warner brothers tour...also......just to go!? what the hell do i have here? marble! i love marble! my parents! mike says if i go don't bother coming back he will change the locks. fine mike fine! i need to start moving my stuff out. he better not give away marble tho. i will take marble. 

what else?  i dont know? mike wants me to get a job, why so i can pay rent? oh...i said that. im sure ppl are sick of seeing me post about how im leaving mike, even im sick of it. i know he will never change. i know, no matter what, no matter even if i do get a job, hes still going to be a lame old man on the weekends. he was like that when i had a job and was going to school. hes not going to change. well you know what? i am! im going to change! 

i sure as heck need a change! so today he left. he left me here. and stephanie really wanted me to go to her house which is in whitehouse around, (FAR AND DEEP IN COUNTRY ROADS!??) to watch her kids, for free, while she goes to the sands and gambles, when her kids have school tomorrow?! ARE YOU FRUCKING KIDDING ME!???!

WOW PPL! then she made me feel bad cuz i didnt want to? ha! ming ming thinks my parents are home.