tired

i am starting to feel paranoid. i am just sick of people! i hate going to the grocery store. i do not like being around people. i do not want to go to work.

oh but i watched 'machete kills'...again, "pick your POISON!" HA! i need to write about what i go through...interesting FODDER for a story! i need to write about it~!!! seriously! also lots of heads rolling in the movie!?? what dah!??!

aw geez...i have no clue anymore, bout life.

im sleepy tho. i will pray than go to bed, go to work...talk to the lawyer. I just pray that it will all work out for me. I already went to AA, and yes I do plan on not drinking. it will be hard, but i am sick of feeling wiped out and tired and nervous and paranoid and sad the day after i drink. its fun at the time, but i can have fun without drinking. i look forward to being more clear minded! 

of course, summer makes me want to have summer beers and summer wine! and music is very triggering.

i bets go to beds...gnite