I hate Cosmo magazine. Not only is it a repetitive cliche, it is also an assuming magazine for women and jobs. I used to read it, just for the sake of reading a magazine, but I had since stopped. To be honest, I used to purchase a weekly 'tab rag' magazine, Star, just because I would read celebrity gossip. This was years ago, however, say, when I was working at Wal-mart. I would buy these mags so I had something to read during my breaks. What spiked my curiousities and aroused my need to read gossip magazines, such as Star, was actually when I was working at this pharmacuetical company called Alcan, located near Bethlehem PA. This was about, 12 years ago, I would have to say. I was maybe 24 years old? Up until that point, I had worked for various pharmacuetical industries such as Roche Pharmacueticals, and sub-divisions of these industries. Oftentimes, we would have to wear lab coats and be extremely clean and orderly, following all OSHA mandated rules, policies, and protocol. Working at Alcan was pretty interesting and high tech, I used to think. We used Mission Impossible type security to get into the huge labrooms where we would do our work, actually utilizing a fingerprint type scan to unlock the doors to get into the locker rooms. Once inside the locker room, we were to put on these jumpsuits over our clothes and wear these booties over our steel tip boots. On top of that, our hair had to be pulled up in a tight bun and we would then have to put on hair booties too (not hair nets, but the same material as that of the booties on our feet. I can't think because Beauty, a cat, a cat whose main focus is to sleep all day, lounging around, eating sometimes, using the catbox, and sometimes playing, is now breathing heavily, as if she has cat ashtma. Beauty in particular is old and overweight. Once a young kitten, with who I based my "Beauty the Halloween Cat" flash animations on, back when I was going to school for graphic and web design', is now a tired out, fat cat with a breathing problem. Needless to say, her breathing problem is very distracting, making it hard to concentrate. I relate to her, however. I am now a human version of her, wasting away.
Alcan was a pretty interesting place to work at. The hours were from 7am-330, and we were making good money too. For me, 14.00 an hour was well off! We also had breaks, one in the morning, at around 945-10am, and then lunch around say, noon-12:30, and another 15 minute break in the afternoon. (Actually, I am not sure the exact times.) When I would go on break, oftentimes I would notice a Star magazine laying on the big breakroom tables. Let me explain the building and breakroom. This was the loveliest break room I have ever encountered. The building seemed very futuristic, to me at the time. I still can recall the feelings I felt when I worked there. Not only feeling young still, (although at 24, I should of had a doctorates or a Ph.D or a bachelors under my belt, since, according to Cosmopolitan, most young, savvy women go straight to universities to study business, sciences, education, or similar aspirations,) I was used to break rooms of dark, flourescent lit rooms. This one in particular was lit by the natural light of the sun, which was cavorting through thanks to the aid of a huge panel of windows from a very tall wall, almost as that of a loft. It was like the library in Phillipsburg, of which I used to spend time, reading magazines of course, or using the computers to go online and print out pages when the need arrived. I used to love going to the library, just to pass the time if nothing else. During my breaks, I would usually grab a snack from the vending machines which lined the walls. They also had refridgerators and random plants. I am not sure if the plants were real or not, but it added to the ambience, I used to think. I would then grab one of the Star mags. Back then Star magazine was all paper, almost like a newspaper. I would flip through the pages, and focus on the 'would you be caught wearing' or the fashion disaster/flops of the week. I would read gossip about Britney Spears, or Paris Hilton. I would read about the 'hot clubs and hot spots' littered around Manhatten and Los Angeles, and dream about that kind of lifestyle. Young, attractive starlets, mingling and dating each other, losing weight and working out for new roles. I remember thinking how hot Jessica Simpson looked gearing up for her role as Daisy Duke for the Dukes and Hazzard, and I wanted to adopt the Daisy Duke style. It all seemed so surreal to me, yet so astonishing. Then a bell would sound, and it would be back to our jumpsuits and booties and hair protectors, and our safety glasses, to inspecting the medicine and powders and weighing them, and making sure they were properly sealed and ready to be packaged.
Reading magazines, to me, has always been a past-time. Starting from aged 13, when I remember I had received my first copy of Seventeen magazine. My mother had payed for a Seventeen magazine subscription for me, along with YM and Teen magazine. I would read those monthly, adopting a monthly allegiance with Sassy magazine as well. I brought my first copy of Seventeen to a family camping trip, and it would help me envision how high school would be for me. I was filled with nerves, awe, and curiousity about entering the 9th grade.
Up until a few years ago, I was a mad, occult member of sorts to that of Cosmopolitan magazine, but I had started to become very annoyed and sick of reading about the same, recycled 'sex' themed articles. Cosmpolitan is a juxtaposition of what a woman makes. For one, it talks about women, who go on to Ivy League schools, and then earning entry level positions in a CEO led world, giving these young women advice on how to approach their intimidating boss, who is always a woman as well, in asking for raises. On the opposite prism of working in these cubicle gardens, faxing and filing away, meeting deadlines for a very important journalistic peice on the intergrity of balancing work and a social life, Cosmopolitan also touches base on how to flirt and meet the right man, as well as sex tips and kegal exercises.
I stopped purchasing this magazine. I was just sick of how they imagine the average woman to be. Not only is she a fine college graduate, she is also sexually motivated, and Cosmo is there to help these powerful, young women in guiding them with their recycled tips and ideas. Not every woman has had the chance to go to school like they assume. While I have went to college, and I have two degrees, one in graphic and web design, and another in pharmacy technician, it has been very hard for me to obtain work in these fields. Not every woman is a grad student with a masters. Not every woman is making 50,000 annual. Most are working in struggling jobs, or finding it difficult to obtain work in the field that they went to school for. Cosmopolitan seems to assume that all women are'policy analysts, consultants, founders, and moguls. The medical field is a very smart move for anyone to get into, as well as education and I even find that security and criminal justice is a very rewarding job as well. Government jobs help secure a long lasting career as well. I commend and admire anyone who has found the right route for them to flourish and live comfortably.
I just recently purchased Cosmpolitan magazine while at the airport. Amongst reading and perusing it, it just felt like a far cry from who I am, and where I am, in my life now. I think magazines are just for entertainment, as is anything for that matter. Television, now being overshadowed by the boundless arena the internet has to offer us, and social media have now taken their place. Personally, I think that people do not feel the need for advice anymore, as distraction has now become such a dilemma as also an answer.
Cosmo, not all women are young and working at jobs like your magazine suggests. Some are happy to get a call back from White Castle, even if they will be working with high school students. It is called a job. It is called WORK!
oh man!!!????
i was going to write more...about my friend kim...see, we both went to high school together. we both shared the remainder of our school day, after lunch, in commercial art. I transferred out of Belvidere to go to Warren Technical Vocational HS. While Belvidere was a typical, sports orientated high school, with jocks, preps, football, and cheerleaders, Warren Tech was a vocational high school, where they teach trades suchs as cosmetology, electrician, (here is a link to what they offer http://www.wctech.org/wcts/Admissions/Career%20Programs.pdf?1413232731
i have said it before i will say it again, i went there during the 90s and it was behind the times. it still had an 80s feel to it, although not quite. i thought i was pretty progressive forward, idk...(i quit trying to write somewhat decent because i felt embarrassed at how terrible my writing was!)
it was napolean dynamite esque!
so kim and i were the best of friends! (earl had to die...good bye earl!!!!!!!!! well pack a lunch!)
she just found me someone who she could pal around with. i wrote about this lots of times tho. we were both commercial artists, but tbh, i think that my style was and still is, more creative than her. i recently seen that kim did an online quiz and was mad at the results, which didnt call her as attractive as possible, or creative as possible..also called her jealous...hmm imagine that. she triees to seem like she is all into girls, but i think it may be...because she doesnt want to be seen as jealous.
ya know?
i used to design logos and do my art projects, and i think i have a more creative steadpoint then her, plus i have story ideas and what not, which i dont think she has. i also have an imagination and hers only consists of sexual pursuits, which has leaked into her psyche due to her reading 50 shades of grey. she is constantly posting in the shh group, tagging her new dude who is just tapping that ass since its so easy, 'daddy'...i should be happy for her tho. she met a guy who meets her sexual needs, plus she is a business savvy woman, in this collegiate, modern business woman world. hey she is the typical cosmopolitan woman mold! cept she isnt. at 34 years old, she is already too old for the age bracket cosmo leans towards. her style is not cosmo worthy, its all power suits (think red business power skirt and jacket combos and heels) red is a very loud statement for work, so is wearing red lipstick. i dont think red is meant for work. i think casual chic is a good look, especially where she worked at, where she was helping vets get work.
she went to the marine corps, and she is still focusing on it...its a big focal point for her, her hey dey..
once a marine, always a marine mantra. (i was in the army, but my parents pleaded with the first sargeants to let me out. they still plead with me. "dont go to california! dont take a bus to new york! no no dont go out! please lori") in other words, dont even try! just stay where its safe. since i have been home i have been behaving as politely as possible. i dont fight with my parents. i appreciate them. if it wasnt for them, i would of not had my plane ticket home, or my phone and car insurance bills payed. and i grateful. of course! am i embarrassed. yes! im embarrassed because i shouldnt have to have my parents helping me. i should have a good job! i should already be situated! i appreciate them!
should i talk to a therapist? no? because i can blog here and say that all my life, i have had my parents. they never pushed me or strived for excellence from me.i think i have listened to them and developed a lazy, not even try to aim for the best...sort of outlook on things. my parents always want me to be safe. they never wanted me to try! they never pushed me to keep on keeping on! kim had a mom, who was a bitch to her. kim has been abused by the step dad, and the mother has always been so ill witted towards kim, taking her full paychecks and tax returns to help pay for her bills. kim never had spending money. she also told me of an older babysitter who was a girl sexually abuse her. i had similar experiences but i am not going to talk about them.. she was a boy-crazy, strong girl..i dont know!??
i mean, shes great but she has a clouded way of seeing the world. she thinks she can resume skip and that shes still young and fresh out of college, ready to take on the world with red business power suits, red lipstick, a pair of stilletos and winged eyeliner. she also brags about her sexual pursuits with an ease...she has a good resume, she has degrees she has experienced, she may even be over experienced for most of the jobs she applies for. she is expecting too much. its hard. especially in graphic design. the best thing is to get an ensuring job, and keep pursuing creative jobs. still write, still design...but find a job that will keep you.
ebola protocols geesh
i mean, my advice, say if i had a magazine, would be....get a trade job. security guard. whats wrong with that? its not a creative job, but to me, that would be the perfect job! 18.00 to sit and watch over say, a prison, jail, empty building, warehouse, parking lot, mall, campus. having a military background would help too. join the army as an MP...(they wanted to make me an MP after i obtained a drinking problem while going to school studying spanish as the presidio of monterey california)
even better! girls! become a porn star! straight out of high school! if you are 18 and in porn, you will make LOADS of money!!! then you can get into cam girl modeling and a high class escort. do it straight out of high school! look at that bella knox!! shes a mogul!! she chose to get into the sex industry! become a stripper! once you become famous everyone around you will kiss your butt, despite the comments from ppl calling you disgusting and gross. if they ever met you in person, they would be wowed by your celebrity, so what would it even matter? as long as you surround yourself with yes people, you should be fine! if your famous, it doesnt matter, because everyone will be Wow'ed by you!! plus, you may or probably will end up dating a slew of rock stars and comedians, who will love you have a hot young famous porn star like yourself on their arm. you can be part of their pussy posse! LOL! and move to hollywood!! where none of it even matters!! in fact, those kind of decisions are glorified!! praise rang!!! submit yourself to thedirty.com. make a name for yourself! get a photographer to take pics of your skinny little young bod clad in fancy lingeries, then have the 'is she a high end callgirl' rumors circulate you! your face and body will be leaked to the wonderful world of the internet! to be joyed and revered!! if you are gonna do it tho, be prepared to go full on whore. go all the way! use your money to invest in breast implants and make sure to buy plenty of hair extensions and fake eyelashes. you want to look and feel and act like a famous superstar. you want to feel hot and meow meow when you get into rock shows or make appearances at the rainbow or wherever you think you will be noticed. find dave navarro and hang out with him, or even tom green. hey even corey feldman!! you dont need to DRESS like a porn star, but make enough money to buy free people duds, little black leather dresses, louboutins, versace mixed in with melrose style. then, retire from the game, only to become a porn star recruiter. maybe sing at porn star kareoke, where you just might spot seth macfarlane there, where you can impress him with your SNL svarski style voice....a little whine, mixed with a little wine! that is the formula, my dear!!! you dont even have to tell ppl you escort your body, you can tell little white lies, such as you own your own fashion line or you are assitant to jimmy smits..or whatever..(jk oh but i do have a story about that i said jimmy smits oh i will just write about that later tho!)
you can even wear svarski crystals! it can be a little clue that you 'do anal!!!" ha!
go find moss krivin, and make friends /niceties with him! that way, he will bring you back stage to meet with the likes of dom irrera, where he will lick his chops while staring at your whorish style! (i only say this because last night moss was like, be nice to me! and made it seem like the only reason to be nice to him was bcuz he can get you backstage, and one time we did go backstage, meeting dom irrera, and he was licking his chops while staring at jen... ha just kidding about dom irrera., ..you dont want him you can do better! such as carrottop! yeah carrot top!! (who licked his chops with that tiny little porn star girl, who wasnt very attractive, but she was a tiny porn star! ) flirt it up with uh....idk!?? probably even a big star like mickey rourke!?? then you can his hanger on and do the widdle waddle walk in heels!
never ever put yourself in the role to be made fun of, made to feel insecure, put down, teased, or mocked. you need to make sure that your style over-compensates how you really feel. if you hide yourself behind big hair and fake eyelashes, tattoos, and you have a skinny ribcage exposed, you should be fine. and alway tell youself and others, if admitting to actually being a porn star, try to act like you are sort of a lost girl, make sure the dizzying sense of being abused as a young little girl is always evident, but at the same time, own it!
most of the time if you are hot, ppl will worship that you are in the sex industry. pretend that the real sex industry isnt real. forget about human trafficking, or people that do it as a means to get by, or drug problems, or because they were forced to do it, or because they were so desperate...or because they dont care about themselves. never tell yourself that! never tell yourself that you just dont care about your body, and that you just dont give a shit if anyone sees you naked. so what!! its empowering!!
i mean, look at marilyn monroe! she used her sex appeal and she is now an icon!!!!!!!!!!!! or like, go to a porn convention. that will help you with courage. keep in mind, those girls know how to become lost to all the gross losers crowding around them with their smart phones, some even go to the extent of purchasing a high grade camera, (probably the same guys who go through the extent of paying for a high end prostitute)...to take pics of you...
your young young young! (sorry i dont know ha! i have always been interesting in the sex industry...i mean, i want to write a story about a girl who gets into stripping..) i dont know, ive went to sex awards shows, conventions etc. i like going to strip clubs and one day i want to go to vegas and drive out with a friend of boyfriend to one of the brothels they have. i would love to have a drink at the bar there. i might even agree to meet up with a girl, but NOT ANYTHING SEXUAL i know that they have menus, i might just choose a pillow fight or massage ehh it depends on who i am with! im weird!! so the fuck what!!!??)
i just find the grittiness of it all to be very fascinating. its like , old school vegas. i would have a drink at the bar reason why i said i would order a girl from the menu is because i would think it would be lacking couth to just go there to have a drink to 'stare at the girls' so that is why i would pick something NOT SEXUAL to at least help them out? even tho im sure they make lots of money, actually i hear that dennis hof takes most of the money.
i started this post trying to make it deem readable but it ended up yet another hodge podge of a messy mess of spaghetts...what about spaghetti wrestling!??
if i was a mogul, or a strip club owner, i would have 'spaghetti wrestling night', where the girls would
wrestle around in spaghetti! you bet on which sexy girl wins! coreena or melianna!??!
heh!!
oh, yes thats right. white castle called me. so i think i am going to work there for a while, jsut to get my feet on the ground i suppose...
i never imagined working there tho.....damn. well its something you know!???
weird i just seen a womens equality commercial. cosmo said that women earn substantially less then men do, and if you are a hispanic woman, forget that! you earn the least amount of that of a white male. fucked up!
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